Expecting

Riva discovered she be pregnant. “It won’t be like back in high school.” She told Lil. “Then you won’t expect me to lie for you?” Lil sounded disappointed. Riva had met the Father at the Maxwell Street Masquerade, a blue-faced drag king. “It’s a miracle baby.” Riva claimed. “We’re keeping it?” Lil sounded skeptical. “On a short leash!” Riva nodded. “No problem.” Lil, fickle as usual, changed her attitude instantly. “You know, Riv, they sell those now. You can register for them at Be Baby Bop Shop for the Shower.” Riva started. “What? Register for babies for a Baby Shower?” “No, darling. Nowadays they sell the Miracle Baby Leash. You just fasten it around your child’s neck, and instead of crying, he starts rhyming. It’s some kind of digitally re-mastered sound wave converter, and instead of crying your baby soon be rhyming just like a regular, old Snoop Dogg.”