“I am [insert your name], and I am a Weboholic.”
This is the sentence that could be heard over and over last night in the overcrowded Wigwam Room at the Union League Club of Chicago. Is it any surprise that the city where fast food began, and that is now pushing for fast food chains to kick out the trans. fat oils, is also the first city to set Weboholics Anonymous in motion? WA held its first meeting to discuss the twelve steps on the road to recovery for those who suffer from addictions to surfing online. Experts agree that unless you live in a country that is ruled by an authoritative regime, you really have no business spending more than one-hour on the Internet per day. And a group of concerned megalomaniacs scared up enough funding for a project to spread the word: Good people are becoming incurably addicted to the high-speed influences of Web surfing. One old woman—folks just call her G-Ma—lamented, “My family fled Europe; my nine children grew up feeling rootless. Now my techno grand-babies run away wireless! Aw, criminy! And they say I'm losing my wits. Hell! At least I got wires!” Are you one of those who might make G-Ma uneasy? Or are you one of those who can’t go a day without an online hit, fix, or blow? If so, don’t be ashamed to enroll in the twelve-step program. The first step is admitting you are an Internet junkie. Here's the test: If you can do the “www dot” dance while sitting on your ass then you have real problems! Report to your local chapter of “Weboholics Anonymous” immediately! The sausage king of Chicago was glad he did!